Books Continued

Just like everything else in my life over the last year...I have had good intentions to keep you posted on ALL the books I would read, but unfortunately, the older Noah gets, the harder it is to find time to read!

So my last post I was just starting to read, Divine, by Karen Kingsbury, which was an amazing read! A little longer than some of her other reads but so worth it! It really touched home for me since I work at a Rehab/Recovery Center for Women!

The last book I read was the start of a series called, the Sunrise Series by Karen Kingsbury, and it took me a ridiculous 4 months to finish it! I really loved it an

d can't wait to start the next one called, Summer today! It is a continuation of the Firstborn series; you really get attached to the characters in a series like this! I found myself crying almost every time I would read! Yes, I know, I am a sap! :)

Nate and I have also started reading Rob Bell's new book, Love Wins...although very controversial, we wanted to find out for ourselves what he is really trying to say! We have been a fan of Rob for many years and have read several of his other books, seen many Nooma's and saw him in person last year in Dallas on his Drops like Rain tour! We have finished the chapter on hell and are about to start the chapter on heaven! I don't have a solid opinion yet so I am waiting until I have read the whole book! It is certainly challenging me to figure out why I believe what I believe, like all of his materials do, but I am not sold on his belief yet! Regardless of our decision, we believe that we will still follow Rob Bell...you will not find a single soul who agree with 100% of the time...we believe that He is a man of God and the bottom line is, we believe in God and what the Bible teaches, not in a man...he is simply a messenger and we, as believers, are called to find things out on our own, not just trust a man!

Anyway, enough of that soapbox! :) I'll keep you posted!

Mothers Day

I don't know why I always let so much time pass between posts...oh yeah, i'm a mom!

I can't believe it's mothers day again...last year, I had just had Noah...he wasn't even 1 month old yet!

What have I learned over the last year about being a mother...

#1 Sleeping in does not exist anymore

#2 Time goes faster than it ever has before

#3 Right when you think you have them figured out, they change

#4 I don't have all the answers

#5 It's OK that I don't have all the answers

#6 God is my ever present help in time of need

#7 Being a mother is the most fulfilling job i've ever had

#8 I truly would die for my child

#9 Everything about Noah melts my heart and makes me a better person

#10 All I have to do is look at Noah and he puts life in perspective

#11 As long as he is safe and happy, i'm good!

#12 It's not about me anymore...I never realized how selfish I was before

#13 Finding quality conversation is hard to come by

I could go on and on and can't begin to put into words what I have learned in this 1 year being a mother but God has shown me that I am NOT in control, just in case I had any misconceptions after waiting 3 years for Noah! He has shown me that He loves Noah even more than I do, even though it doesn't seem possible, but His love really is unfathomable, and as long as I place Noah in His hands each and every day, I don't have to worry...God's got him!

Things I used to worry about are so pointless now that I have Noah...all I have to do is look at him and everything else goes away!

Watching him grow into each new phase has been so exciting and fun and exhausting and scary!

It is truly a miracle and a blessing to watch a child grow from a little bean in my belly to a walking, talking little man! It still fascinates me when I see something about him that looks like me or looks like Nate...it's still hard to believe that God took 2 imperfect people and made such an amazing child! I know every mother feels this way, but Noah really is special! I can't wait to see the plans God has for him and I pray every day that they will be Gods plans...not Nate or mine's plan...that we teach him to listen to God and not man!

I am taking some much needed "me" time tonight and I am completely alone and although I am loving it....I miss him so much!

I am so thankful for my mother... those of you who know her, know she is a special lady!

A woman of God who has devoted her life to her husband and children! She has always been there for me, encouraged me, prayed for me and over the last year has helped me more than ever before! There is no such thing as a perfect family or a perfect relationship but I am truly blessed and overwhelmed at how God has formed and shaped my family into what we have now!

Father help me to keep the proper perspective when I am frustrated, tired and overwhelmed...my cup overflows! Thank you Jesus!

The Comforter

He is the Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace! He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow and He is faithful!

As many of you know I have gone back to work, 1 day a week, to become the counselor at New Life Women's Center...so I have been gone from my baby boy for 3 days now to receive my certification through Therapon. I have been having a hard time all weekend with anxiety and not sleeping well, and have been very emotional. Of course I have been praying for Noah's protection and well-being and for those that have been taking care of him but I have not been using the authority given to me by God and I have not been resting in His peace. Mothers, especially I think, tend to feel guilty not worrying when it comes to their children. It's like we think it's our job to control everything regarding their life and so if we are away, it is our job to freak out and worry! This is not what Gods word says!

Last night, I find out that Noah has 102 fever and hasn't slept all day and he is at my parents house and Nate is out of town as well! So of course I fulfilled my duty as a mother and initially, I freaked out and panicked! Thinking I have to come home and be with my baby and omg what are we going to do and what if it spikes in the night and we have to take him to the ER, and, and, and!!!
(Even though, I've been learning all weekend how the "what-if's' in a persons life will kill them)

So after I call Nate and talk to my director at work and we pray together...it hits me, while I am getting ready for bed, and already thinking how i'm not going to be able to sleep at all tonight, because "how can I sleep when i don't know if my baby is ok??!!!" So the Holy Spirit hits me and says, get on your knees and pray and take authority! So immediately I hit the floor just bawling!
Of course...the ONLY thing I can do for Noah, that will make any difference in his life is to place him COMPLETELY in the hands of his Creator and TRULY trust that He is in control, and He is not surprised by this turn of events and He has already died and taken the stripes for our healing, all we have to do is CLAIM IT!!! BELIEVE IT!!! But so often, we BEG God to PLEASE heal our loved ones and PLEASE give me peace, Amen! NO, NO, NO! Not that God doesn't hear those prayers...he does, but I want to be POWERFUL in my prayers...and the word says that He feels our pain, he catches our tears, but that is not what moves Him...Our faith is what moves him and calls things to reality! Our faith is what brings action!
He said, after He was crucified we would receive, the Counselor and with Him, we would be able to do far greater things than even Jesus did!
What are you doing that is far greater than Jesus did?
I had to ask myself that question and sadly my answer was nothing! Can you imagine how frustrating that must be for God (or maybe just me!) But it hit me last night that I have all authority to claim my son healed and whole and rebuke EVERY strategy that Satan would try to form against me and my family and that my words, in faith, cause it to be done! That's it! So simple; no worry, no fear!

I have never felt such peace and comfort when it sunk in that the Creator of my son, who has known him before me, who somehow loves him more than me, was in his room with him, holding him close, healing his body, giving him sweet sleep when I couldn't be there! What more could you ask for!
When we speak with authority, in Jesus name, Satan's plan vanishes! He can not touch us! And, when we speak with authority, in Jesus name, God moves on our behalf and we can, with confidence, say "Yes and Amen" meaning it is done! We have already won every battle we just have to start acting like it and stop letting Satan have his way with us!

Does that mean we don't ever struggle with fear, and worry and heartache...NO! I did sleep well last night but the few times I woke up, it was my natural first instinct to worry; but I quickly stopped myself, because...believe it or not, we do have control over our thoughts, and I said out loud, "No devil, my son is healed in the name of Jesus and Lord I trust you! I thank you God!" and went back to sleep!
This morning I called and Noah slept all night and his fever has broke and I was not surprised...I really knew that when I called this would be the report because my God is not a man that He should lie. He is faithful to do what He says He will do!
I am a work in progress and the best teacher is experience and hard times and I know that after this experience I understand this concept of surrender and faith much better!
Lord please continue to mold me and shape me into the woman of God that you desire me to be! Thank you for your power and your greatness and yet your intimacy and closeness with ME! I love you Lord and I lift my voice to worship You!
Yes and Amen!

2011 is going to be a GREAT year!

Wow, I really wish I had more time to blog! It's hard to know where to start when it's been so long, because there is so much to say!

Already, I have had some crazy health issues this year...ended up in the ER for Kidney stones (thought I was dieing!!) I still have 4 more hanging out in there so I am praying that I don't ever pass them! Also, Nate has had a few migraines this y ear so we decided that we are claiming this scripture over our family this year...
"Don't lose sight of my words. Let them penetrate deep within your heart, for they bring life and radiant health to anyone who discovers their meaning. Above all else, guard your heart, for it effects everything you do....Look straight ahead and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; then stick to the path and stay safe. Don't get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil." Proverbs 4:21-23 & 24-27

So many times we read Gods word and don't really understand the power that His word contains! Speaking His word and understanding it's meaning is what gets things moving in the spiritual realm and I don't know about you but that makes me excited because it lets me know that i'm not helpless...that my God has given me the authority to speak His word and make things happen! They are not just words on a page but they are LIFE! Thank you Jesus!

I have been doing Pilate's now for about 2 months and am loving it! Even got my Mom doing it too! I am so excited because I set a goal for myself to be back in my pre-pregnancy jeans within 9 months of having Noah, since it took me 9 months to gain the weight, and I did it!
Nate and I also set a goal to run a 1/2 marathon by the end of 2011 and so we have started running 3 times a week to train for it! We are starting with a 5K in Brenham, April 9th, called the Blue Bell Fun Run! I can't wait!

Noah is growing like crazy! It is all happening too fast! He is 9 months old now and crawling everywhere! He has 8 teeth and is eating just about anything and everything! He is also pulling himself up to stand on everything and gets around pretty well! It's hard to keep up with him! :)

We have been trying to train him to sleep on his own but have been unsuccessful so far! He really fights sleep and we haven't been able to be very consistent because he got sick right after we started and was having a hard time sleeping because poor baby couldn't breath!
we are trying again and some nights are easy and some nights he really tests us! Some days he naps great, other days he won't hardly nap at all! It has been rather frustrating! :(

He has started testing us and definitely understands "no" and he knows when he is doing something he shouldn't be! I have always known we are all born with a sin nature and there is nothing good in us except what comes from God and raising Noah illustrates that so well! No one has taught him to disobey or hit and scratch and pull hair when he gets mad but he does! So that has been fun! Haha! Overall though I couldn't be more blessed...he is such a good boy and I am so in love!

Another new year surprise...I have gone back to work at New Life Women's Center, where I was the teacher before I had Noah! It is just 1 day a week and I am no longer the teacher but I am going to be the counselor! I am being trained by the director and am also going to get certified in a few weeks when I go to a 3 day training school in Houston! I am really excited about it, even though it is taking some getting used to! I really miss Noah on those days but I know it is good for both of us! He is getting to spend some time with different family members and I am getting to use the gifts God has given me!

Our photography business has slowed down a bit, which is nice after a very busy Christmas season! We have some senior portrait sessions booked and a couple of bridal shoots & weddings coming up so if you are interested in family portraits or anything let us know; we have some availability!

I am expecting many great things for 2011 and am excited to see what God has in store! He has blessed us abundantly and He is so good!
That's what is new with the Saffle's and hopefully I will be able to blog more often! :)
Love!!!!

Miracles

God is so amazing...sometimes the way He works just overwhelms me!
One morning I was praying, when I was pregnant with Noah, and God gave me this song and I wrote it down and haven't really looked at it again in a while. Then last week in prayer I felt God prompting me to look back through my journal and I came across these words again and immediately I felt God give me a melody for part of it! Once again, I got busy and haven't thought about it since last week. But, this morning while I was praying the song kept repeating itself in my head and I just wanted to share it and I hope it encourages someone else the way it has encouraged me...

Against all hope, in hope I believe
In the substance of things hoped for but can not be seen
clinging to the promises of God
not wavering in doubt
I am strengthened in my faith and give glory to my God

I am fully persuaded that my God has the power to do what He says He can do
I am fully persuaded that His promises are true

I believe that you are faithful
I believe that you are true
I believe that you are Holy
and I know that I love you

You have given me a miracle, you have heard my deepest cry
You have caught my every tear and given me my hearts desire
Through hard times. trials and pain
By faith i've not lost but gained
Your love and mercy overwhelm me
they flow so endlessly

I believe that you are faithful
I believe that you are true
I believe that you are Holy
and I know that I love you

My life and my time is in His hands
I submit to His will and I yield to His plan
You are not a man that you should lie
So I stand before you now and lift my voice in faith and cry

I believe that you are faithful
I believe that you are true
I believe that you are Holy
and I know that I love you


I know that in Gods perfect timing He will give me the melody for the rest of the song but right now I have what I need to get me through the trials facing me right now!
Last week Pastor Allen talked about miracles and finding hope in a hopeless, dead end situation and that is what I am doing! I am taking down my dead end sign and replacing it with hope! For I know that just like it says in Mark 4:22, God will reveal all things and everything that is hidden will eventually be brought to light! So I can't give up, I must have hope that relationships can be restored and pain can be forgiven and the past can be healed!

Another song really spoke to me this morning...an oldy but a goody...

You alone are my strength my shield
to you alone may my spirit yield
you alone are my hearts desire
and I long to worship you

God is a God of miracles and they are everywhere if you just take the time to take your eyes off the problems and focus on the many things we take for granted...it is a miracle that I am still married to the same man after 8 years, it is a miracle that I have a beautiful, healthy son, it is a miracle that we always have just enough to make ends meet each month, it is a miracle that the seasons change each year and the sun comes up each morning and I can breathe each breath I take! Thank you Jesus for coming and humbling yourself to live among us and for your grace and mercy that are new to me each morning! You are truly a God of miracles!

Long time

It has been a long time since I have written and I have missed it! Nate is on his first hunting trip since I have known him and it is 8 o'clock and i'm already in bed! HA! I'm a party animal!
I always want this blog to be about the reality of a "normal life" and so once again I am just going to "get real! "
I am having a hard time finding balance in my life! I know and believe that my priorities should be God, Nate, Noah and then friends...but this has not been the case! I feel like it's Noah, Noah, then a lil Nate and a lil God and no friends!
Over the last 3 years, while I was working at New Life Women's Center, my relationship with God grew so much...we had an hour of prayer every morning, I taught Bible studies all day, lead worship once a week; I was immersed in His word and His presence! Now I find it hard to even pray for 10 minutes without being intterupted !! Instead of listening to worship music, it's Blue's Clues and Baby Einstein music all day! I have been reading the same book for 3 months, much less finding the time to do a Bible study! I feel like I am going crazy!! AHHH!
Then, after taking care of Noah all day, I am so exhausted at night that I feel like I have nothing left to give to Nate! Running this photography business takes up all my spare time (when Noah's sleeping) during the day and I feel like all I ever talk to Nate about is the business and his new job which has been all consuming(NOT complaining, just stating the facts) and then my brain is mush!

I spend alot of time with my parents but as far as friends are concerned or a social life it's pretty much non-existent and I struggle with, is it fair for me to leave Noah to have girl time, is it selfish for me to want to leave Noah with Nate so I can go do something I want without them?!
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love being a Mom and I love staying at home with him and I am so proud of Nate and our business and so thankful for all the business we've been doing I just need to find some balance!
I find myself being the person that I used to be; the person I have worked so hard to not be! Getting angry really easily and allowing it to fester instead of getting rid of it quickly and being quick to forgive! Being extremely controlling and having to always be right! I hate those things about myself!
But like everything else is life worth anything, you have to work at killing the flesh and being more Christlike and when all I do is take care of everybody else, and neglect my relationship God, then slowly but surely, the flesh creeps back in!

I want to be a good mom and I have waited so long to have Noah and he is such a blessing to me but am I really doing the right thing by him if I don't take care of myself and my relationships!??!!
Sooooo...I am already thinking about New Years Resolutions and I am going to find some balance in my life for 2011! I need more JESUS for sure! I miss the times I had with Him, He truly is my best friend, who is ever faithful no matter how much I neglect Him! He never leaves me or forsakes me! Thank you Jesus!

Nate is a wonderful man...not perfect, but wonderful! He deserves to have more of my heart instead of the leftovers! I know that the best thing I can do for Noah is to show him what a healthy marriage looks like...not just tell him, but live it out!
I miss my friends so much! I am going to get a social life again! Woo Hoo! I don't know how but I am going to make it a priority to get away without the boys and share my life with other women!
I also really miss singing, so starting in 2011 I am going to join the choir! Yes, it's a commitment of time and once again, i don't know how i'm going to make it all work, but if it's meant to be, God will make a way!
I know not everyone appreciates me airing my dirty laundry but i think it's important that people know that the facade of a perfect family, doesn't exist...Life is hard and messy and not always fun, but God is so good, and always pulls you through the hard times and the laughter in between makes it all bearable! Do Nate and I fight...sure we do...are there days that it all seems too overwhelming and I just want to give up...yep...do we make mistakes and hurt each other on a daily basis...probably...BUT do we truly love each other...absolutely...do I have joy in my heart...yes...am I blessed...abundantly!!!

This Christmas season, I am making a commitment to focus my heart where it should have been for a while now...not on the things that aren't right, not on the people that don't act right, not on the past, but on being thankful for all the blessings in my life, forgiving those that have hurt me, being the best me I can be for my family!
I just want to love on God, Nate and Noah and some girl friends that have been really neglected!
So thankful for all the people in my life, even the ones that stretch me and help me learn how to be the person God wants me to be! If God is for me, who can be against me! Amen!
I feel better already...it's amazing how writing it all out brings so much clarity perspective...even if only for me! Thanks for reading!

EVERYTHING CHANGES!!!!

Well, God works in mysterious ways! Sometimes that's an understatement! He is definitely teaching us that He is in control and if we only get out of the way, He wants to bless us abundantly...giving us our hearts desires! He is so good! As I wrote about a few months ago, Nate recently started a new job with Center-point, which was a blessing b/c he had been looking for a change for a long time, and the money was good so he was able to quit his second job so we had him back on weekends! So all was great and we were just getting adjusted to the new job and then God does something miraculous! There was a position that became available at the Ark church where we have been attending for 5 years that fell in Nate's lap and all has worked out as only God could have done! Once again, Nate will be changing jobs the end of this month and will be the systems administrator for the Ark and he is so excited! This is truly a dream job that will require alot of time and hard work but in an excellent environment and he will have tremendous opportunity to be stretched and to grow! Challenging but so rewarding and for eternal purposes! :) Praise God! It is so obvious that God's hand is in all of this because as the scripture says, On my own I can do nothing, but with God ALL things are possible!
I love our church and am so thankful that Nate will be able to work there...for those that are married...you understand that when a man loves his job, he is so much happier when he comes home and it makes a huge difference in your relationship! Nate has learned to be content with his other jobs but none of them have truly fulfilled him or been something he looked forward to each day! Ask and you shall receive...we have been praying for years that God would put Nate somewhere he would love to work and find purpose and fulfillment there and in His perfect timing he works all things together for the good of those who love Him! Thank you Jesus!
Now if He can just help me be flexible as everything changes AGAIN! :)


As for Noah...I can't believe he will be 6 months this weekend! I weighed him today and he weighs 16 lbs, 9 oz! He is so big! :)
We have gotten through the peas, squash, green beans and today we started carrots and so far so good! Next is sweet potatoes then fruits!

Here's a video of Noah and his Daddy! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uterlrsegOs

Going to Attascosita (sp?) this weekend to photograph my brother and his family! Haven't seen them in a while so looking forward to spending some time with them!